Fanaa: Dissappointing!

As i sauntered into a plush Pune multiplex to watch FANAA, I was carrying an excess baggage of expectations. From Yashraj to Aamir... From Kunal Kohli to Kajol. But when i walked out after the show, i felt cheated... cheated for the fact that i actually bought a ticket to watch a really, really dumb film. FANAA fails majorly. Why? Read on...


WARNING::::

This Review is a Spoiler and has details about the plot. Things that might shock u while watching the film. So if u intend to watch it. Dont read beyond this. But still, dont watch the film. Its not worth your money.








Basically, FANAA is a love story between a Blind kashmiri girl, Zooni (Kajol) and a tourist guide (Rehan). Now it doesnt come as a surprise when we realize that Aamir is not a tourist guy but actually a terrorist, and a major terrorist for that matter. Zooni comes to Delhi to perform in a Republic Day function with a few friends. There tourist guide Rehan is assigned duty to take them around. He says more shayari than dialogue, flirts with our blind jane, sings songs and when he is not doing either of the three things, he talks on a cellphone.

Then, despite of repeated warnings from her friends, Zooni falls for Rehan's charm. They start dating(!) and end up in bed after a night long date.

Rehan also falls in love with her after she mouths a dialogue and decides to marry her. She has an eye operation but then gets the shock of her life.

The director spares us for the 7 years in between as he introduces us to the other side of Rehan, the terrorist mastermind who has joined the Indian Army(!) on a mission. After an MI-2 esque chase sequence, he ends up injured standing at Zooni's door. He is shocked when his son (Remember He and Zooni had made love once?) opens the door. Obviously Zooni hasnt seen him, but she can still remember his voice n touch n all that. Basically the terrorist assures marriage once again when fate strikes again...

This is the story of Fanaa. Interesting? Not at all. Boring? Majorly. Did i feel like getting out of the theatre? Yes. How many times? Well... 3 to be precise.

This is a film from the Yashraj stable who claim to be making high quality products to demand a hike in ticket prices at multiplexes. Well, if Fanaa is their definition of high quality... I cant really say much.

Why did I hate Fanaa so much...? Here are 10 points i hated about the film. Some logical flaws and some glaring technical loopholes...

1> Why would a blind girl start dating a tourist guy and end up in bed just 2 days later? What the hell was her teacher(Lillete Dubey) doing when Zooni wasnt at the hostel at night?
2> If Rehan is a mastermind terrorist, why does he roam out in the open flirting with blind girls, guiding tourists... and how the hell does he keep his actual identity?
3>What is Rehan's ideology? How does he conviniently fall in love, then even more conviniently get out of it and still more conviniently fall in it again?
4>Why does a most wanted terrorist sing stupid songs with his kid long after he has recovered? Why does he not go and finish his HIGH PRIORITY mission first?
5>How does he manage to join the Indian Army? I mean, is it so easy to get in the Indian army?
6>Which anti terrorist outfit will make a nuclear missile by stealing different parts from different countries?
7> What the hell was the editor doing? The film is painfully L0000000000ng and lasts for a total 3 hrs. It is very slow.
8> All songs except Subhan Allah and Dekho na are pathetic.
9> The Screenplay kills the film. It is full of loopholes and potholes. It is full of logical flaws. The ones i mentioned above are just 50% of the total flaws.
10>The direction(Kunal Kohli) is a downer. He is not at ease with the script nor with the treatment of it.

There are a few heartwarming scenes in the film like the initial confrontations between Aamir and Shruti Seth(Kajol's friend) or the scene between Kajol and Aamir in an Auto Rickshaw.

The actors are amazing. Kajol looks stunning and does her part with conviction. You cant help but smile in her intro scene where she salutes the Indian Flag. Aamir's character is terribly sketched and is very confused for the lead man. It is neither plain white nor is it a black. It fails and is the reason for Fanaa failing. Actors like Shiney Ahuja, Lara Dutta and Lillete Dubey are wasted in totally inconsequential roles.

On the whole FANAA is a notch below average. Dont watch it in a theatre people. It is simply not your money's worth. Wait for the DVD release.

All i can say is people in Gujarat are lucky. For beginners, FANAA wasnt released in Gujarat!

My Rating: *